I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems…
Fireflies – Owl City
Hush, little baby, don't say a word…
"Aunt Bella! Aunt Bella!"
Mama's gonna buy you a mockingbird…
"What is it, Jake?"
And if that mockingbird won't sing…
"Come quick! Eddie needs you!"
Mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring…
"Eddie? What?" He tugs on my hand, pointing to the staircase.
And if that diamond ring turns brass…
"Aunt Bellaaaaa… Come on! You're too slow!" I let him pull me towards the stairs, and then we're climbing.
Mama's gonna buy you a looking glass…
"Jake, what's the rush?"
And if that looking glass gets broke…
"The baby's crying!"
Mama's gonna buy you a billy goat…
We walk down the hallway, towards a door with light all around it.
And if that billy goat won't pull…
"Bella?"
Mama's gonna buy you a horse and cart…
I push open the door and walk into the room, and there's Edward, holding a little bundle in his arms.
And if that horse and cart fall down…
He smiles at me as he turns, and then suddenly I'm watching myself walk towards him with hair that's the wrong color and a stomach that's larger than my own.
You'll still be the sweetest little boy in town…
I take the bundle from his arms, and smile as it makes a soft cooing sound.
So hush, little baby, don't you cry…
I move round to get a better look at the bundle, and scream when I see James' face stare straight back at me.
'Cause your daddy loves you and so do I...
"Bella?... Bella!"
I startled awake with a gasp.
"Hey, baby." I felt Edward press against me from behind as he spoke, and couldn't help but sigh contentedly, the memory of my dream fading rapidly.
"Hey," I murmured, turning my head in his direction. He smiled at me, then leaned forwards and pressed his lips to mine, coaxing my body to turn in his direction.
It had been ten days since James' attack, and Edward still hadn't been put back on active duty by Aro, which meant we'd made next to no progress as far as our escape plan went. On the plus side, the free time had allowed Edward and I to develop our relationship, both physically and emotionally, but even there the progress wasn't exactly speedy. It was almost like we'd hit a plateau, and while I wasn't complaining about the relationship side of things, the not-being-able-to-make-plans-to-get-out-of-this-hell-hole side of things really sucked.
"Didyme called," he told me softly as he slowly hitched my leg up around his hip, pulling me in to him. "She said she can fit you in today."
I frowned. "Fit me in for what?"
"Getting this…" His free hand moved to touch my upper arm, right over my implant. "… taken out."
"It doesn't need to come out until next week," I replied, then moaned as Edward rolled me over onto my back and shifted on top of me, kissing my neck.
"I know that," he told me, guiding my leg around his waist to give him better access. "But I figured that we'd rather be safe than sorry, right? I mean, there's no guarantee she'd be able to fit us in until it's too late."
"Right," I mumbled distractedly, wrapping my other leg around him as I brought his lips back up to mine. "How much time do we have?"
"Not enough," he replied, pushing his hips against me, "but I doubt she'll mind if we're late."
"Mmm, sounds good," I muttered as he slid one of his hands between us, trailing his fingers down my stomach before letting them slip between my folds. I hissed in a breath, caught between pleasure and pain.
"Sore?" he murmured, his voice laced with concern.
"A little bit," I admitted. I wasn't surprised about that, though; we hadn't exactly been slow and gentle in the shower the night before.
"I'm sorry, baby." He kissed me softly, then slowly began to move down my body, cupping my breasts in his hands before lowering his head to them. I gasp-groaned as he gently sucked one of my nipples into his mouth, flicking his tongue over it before moving on to the other one and doing the same there.
"Edward…" I threaded my fingers into his hair, then gripped his hand with my free one and moaned as he moved even further down my body, letting his lips trail kisses down my stomach. He carefully nudged my legs further apart, then gently parted my folds with his fingers before lowering his head and teasing me with his tongue.
"Mmm…" he hummed, and the slight vibration it created was enough to make me inhale sharply in shock. I felt him smile against me, then moaned embarrassingly loudly and squeezed his hand as he did it again, teasing my entrance with one of his fingers.
"Please," I whispered, pushing my hips towards him. He let go of my hand, then gently held one of my legs in place as his tongue replaced his fingers briefly before returning to my clit. I tugged on my bottom lip with my teeth, trying to keep quiet, but then he slid a finger inside me and curled it upwards, making me groan softly.
"Okay?" he murmured as he slowly began to move his finger. I nodded quickly, pleading with my eyes for more, and he gave me it with only a little hesitation. I felt that undeniable pleasure start to swell inside me, but before it became too much, I whispered for him to stop.
"Did I hurt you?" he asked, sounding horrified. I shook my head and reached down for him, pulling up against me again and kissing him deeply. He moaned softly in shock as I wrapped my legs around him, and I smiled against his lips before lowering my hand between us and wrapping my fingers around him.
"Bella…" he protested weakly, but then I positioned him in just the right place, and I felt him start to give in. "You're sore."
"It's not that bad," I told him honestly, carefully shifting my hips to allow him to enter me ever so slightly. He inhaled sharply and closed his eyes, the tension in his muscles betraying how difficult it was for him to remain still. "Baby, you won't hurt me."
"If I do…"
"I'll tell you," I promised, smiling at him as I pulled his lips to mine and kissed him softly. He hesitated for a few moments, but then finally, blessedly, he slowly thrust forwards, and my body accepted every perfect inch of him.
"Fuck…" he breathed once he was as deeply inside me as possible, burying his face in my neck. I wrapped my arms around him tightly, hugging him to me, then whimpered in protest as he started to pull his hips back.
"Sorry," he said softly, stilling immediately.
"I'm not hurt," I murmured quickly. "I just… Stay still for a sec?"
He raised his head and gazed into my eyes for a few moments, smiling slightly. "Okay, baby."
Sighing softly, he pressed his forehead against mine, and I had to close my eyes as I let myself absorb all the emotions and sensations of the moment. I loved feeling him like this. There was nothing that compared to it, nothing that felt as good, and I hated knowing that we couldn't stay this way for longer. It was never enough.
"Bella?" I slowly opened my eyes again, and once he was sure my gaze was on his, he slowly began to move his hips, first with shallow thrusts, then ones that were much deeper. I tried to keep my eyes open as long as possible, wanting to keep that connection, but then he kissed me, and I couldn't help but close them. This moment belonged to us, and I wanted to shut everything else out, even though it would only be for a few precious seconds.
"I…" He trailed off, and then his kisses and thrusts became more urgent, almost as though he was trying to tell me something – something important – without using words. I knew what I wanted that something to be, of course, but wishful thinking would only result in this bubble around us bursting, and then I'd have nothing.
"Oh, God… Isabella…" He trailed his lips down to my ear, and then he was mouthing words I couldn't hear, slipping his arms beneath me to hold me against him. I clung onto him tightly, feeling that undeniable build-up begin.
"Edward, I'm…" I moaned softly, burying my face in his neck. "Shit."
"Yes, baby," he whispered, and I felt him smile against me as my breathing hitched and my pleasure reached its peak, washing over me in a steady wave that didn't seem to want to let up.
"Please," I breathed, letting my head fall back onto the pillows beneath me as Edward gripped my shoulders with both hands, keeping me flush against him as he thrust. I slid my hands up his back, then cupped his cheeks in my hands briefly before pushing his slightly dampened hair back from his forehead.
"Bella…" He gazed into my eyes for a moment, but then I felt him start to tense, and his eyes clamped tightly shut as he crushed his lips to mine. He moaned into my mouth as his climax hit, and I reflexively pulled him closer to me with my legs, wanting to make this last just a little bit longer.
Though we were no longer kissing, Edward's lips lingered against mine as his thrusts slowed to a very subtle rocking of his hips, almost as though he was as reluctant to part as I was. Each time we were together this way, the intensity between us grew, making the connection we had even more tangible than before. And every single time, it became harder and harder to pull away.
So when Edward carefully rested some more of his weight onto me and pressed gentle, open-mouthed kisses to my neck, I couldn't help but sigh in a mixture of relief and contentment. He wasn't going anywhere. For now.
"Edward," I eventually managed to whisper, and when he lifted his head to look at me, his gaze more intense than it'd ever been before, that emotion rose up inside of me so forcefully, I had to press my lips to his to stop the words from coming out.
But when our lips parted and I looked up at him again, I simply had to say something.
"I-" His eyes widened slightly, and before I could get anything out, he pressed his lips hard onto mine. I moaned in shock and kissed him back, but then I realized he was trying to distract me, and I quickly pulled away, cupping his cheeks in my hands to stop him from trying again.
His reaction proved I'd done the right thing first off by stopping myself from saying that, but I wasn't entirely sure why. Was it because he knew that, if I'd said it, he wouldn't be able to say it back? Or maybe he was as terrified as I was, and knew that the moment we voiced those words, things would change?
I turned my head away from him and let my hands drop to his shoulders - to push him away or hold him closer, I wasn't sure - and I whispered the new, replacement words anyway.
"I really care about you."
He sighed, and when I felt his arm start to move from under me, I shut my eyes and grimaced. Fuck.
"Bella…" I clamped my eyes shut even tighter as dread coursed through me, then shivered at the feel of Edward's hand against my cheek, gently trying to turn my head back in his direction.
"Open your eyes," he murmured. I hesitated for a moment, then opened my eyes and stared fixedly at his shoulder. He exhaled an unsteady breath, stroking my cheek with his thumb.
"Baby…" he almost-pleaded, sounding upset. I swallowed audibly, then forced myself to look up at him.
"That's better," he whispered, giving me a relieved smile. I wanted to give him one back, but my lips just wouldn't move, even as his smile faded. It wasn't until he opened his mouth to speak that my lips finally unglued themselves. For all the wrong reasons.
"We should probably go," I told him quietly, but the moment I moved my hands and tried to shift from underneath him, he let more of his weight rest on me and pinned my wrists to the bed above my head, immobilizing me.
"We should," he agreed, gazing down at me intensely. "But we're not going to. Not yet."
"Edward…" I protested weakly, then groaned when he dipped his head and kissed me softly.
"I really care about you, too," he whispered against my lips, then raised his head again as I smiled shyly. He grinned back down at me, then slowly slid his hands up my arms and entwined our fingers, squeezing gently.
"Okay," he said softly a few seconds later. "Now we can go."
"Why are we taking the maintenance shuttle again?" I asked Edward as we walked hand in hand down a familiar-looking hallway almost half an hour later.
"It's quicker," he told me, his voice sounding a little strange. "Plus, it saves us from having to walk up so many stairs."
That made no sense – we'd had to walk down several more flights of stairs than usual to get to this floor in the first place. I opened my mouth to point that out, but Edward squeezed my hand so hard it was almost painful as he reached forwards to hit the 'call' button, so I quickly shut it again.
Whatever his true reason for being down here was, it clearly wasn't meant to be revealed to the mics.
A few seconds later, the shuttle doors opened, and Edward gestured for me to enter it first, placing his hand on my lower back as I moved past him. Once we were both inside, he pressed the 'H' button on the control panel, then moved back a few steps so we were in the center of the shuttle, pulling me against him so that we were chest to chest and his back was to the doors. I frowned slightly, confused, but slid my arms around his waist anyway, and smiled when he wrapped his around me in return.
As the shuttle started to move, Edward began to hum a tune I barely recognized, and I felt one of his feet start to tap in time with a beat only he could hear. I didn't think much of it at first, but when he pressed me harder against him and tapped with more urgency, I realized he wasn't just humming a random tune to pass the time. He was trying to tell me something.
Taking enough time for it to seem casual, I looked around the shuttle before eventually lowering my gaze to the floor, specifically the area beside his tapping foot. There seemed to be some kind of dented line in the metal there that I'd never noticed before, and as I followed it across to a corner several inches later, I realized it was there for a reason.
Not wanting to seem suspicious, I looked back up at Edward again before I could fully work out what that dent was for, then raised my eyebrow.
"What the hell are you trying to hum?" I asked, trying to think of a way to get a better look at the floor without raising unwanted questions.
"It's a song I've had stuck in my head for a while," he replied nonchalantly, shrugging. "Why? Don't you like it?"
"I'd like it much better if you could hum in tune," I lied, carefully shifting my left foot and pressing the end of one of the shoelaces on my right shoe to the floor.
"I'm an amazing hummer!" Edward protested, and as he leaned in so his lips were beside my ear, I moved my right foot, hopefully undoing my shoelace in the process.
"And if I remember this morning correctly," he murmured, just about loud enough for the microphones to pick up, "you ought to think the same."
I let my eyes fall shut and pulled my bottom lip between my teeth as if stifling a moan at the memory, then groaned softly when Edward's hands slipped down and squeezed my ass through my jeans.
"I take back what I said," I told him as I opened my eyes again. "You're an excellent hummer, and I want you to keep on doing it."
"That's what I thought," he said softly, then kissed that spot below my ear before straightening up and smirking as the shuttle doors slid open. Please work…
"Let's go." He took a step back from me, taking my hand in his to lead me out the shuttle, and as I moved my foot forwards, I pretended to stumble.
"Shit!" I gasped as Edward 'caught' me, then looked down at my feet in false confusion. "My shoelace is undone."
Not waiting for Edward to react, I quickly crouched down and took my time doing my shoelace up as I glanced over to what was revealed to be a three-sided square. And, when I looked closer, I realized that what I'd thought were dents went all the way through the bottom of the shuttle. It was a trapdoor.
Trying not to let my surprise show, I straightened up again once I'd finished tying my laces, and smiled sheepishly at Edward, whose face was the perfect picture of confused concern.
"Okay?" he asked, and I knew he wasn't just referring to my well-being.
"Perfect," I told him as I stepped out the shuttle. He smiled happily at me, and as we started to walk down the short, white hallway leading away from the shuttle, our fingers brushed, then entwined automatically, like it was something that came naturally to us.
I smiled to myself, because I knew now that it genuinely was something natural and not something we did to put on a front. We barely had to think about that stuff anymore.
When we eventually reached the set of double doors at the end of the hallway, Edward squeezed my hand tightly, then pushed open the door and pulled me in behind him. To my surprise, the room we'd entered into looked like a reception area, and a woman I knew to be called Makenna was sitting behind a desk, typing away on a computer.
Edward cleared his throat as we approached the desk, and Makenna looked up in shock, then smiled when she realized who we were.
"Hi, guys," she said softly. "You here for Didyme?"
Edward nodded. "We set up an appointment for half 10."
Makenna glanced at the clock, then smiled knowingly. We were twenty minutes late, even though we'd rushed to get dressed and get down here, but I couldn't even bring myself to blush.
"I'll call her and let you know you're here."
"Thanks, Makenna," I replied, then sighed as I leaned in to Edward's side. He let go of my hand and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, kissing the top of my head as Makenna murmured into the phone.
She was one of the doctors here who worked under Didyme. Her husband was named Charles, who was also a doctor, and the pair of them usually dealt with the major trauma cases which came in (pretty frequently, from the sound of things). Didyme was more of a general doctor, though she did aid Makenna and Charles on the major cases when they needed her, which explained why she was always the one who came to tend to mine and Edward's needs.
I'd known Didyme couldn't have been the only doctor in the place, but it still surprised me when Edward first told me that, not only did they have three main doctors, they had a team of qualified nurses at their beck and call as well. I had no idea how they'd managed to pull that off, but part of me thought that was probably a good thing.
"She's in room four," Makenna told us both as she put down the phone. "You can go straight through."
"Thanks," Edward replied, smiling at her before turning to me and murmuring, "You ready?"
I nodded eagerly, then waved goodbye to Makenna as Edward took my hand and lead me down a hallway to the left of the desk, passing several doors before finally stopping to knock on one.
"Come in!"
Edward pushed open the door and gestured for me to go in before him, smiling reassuringly. I grinned back at him as I stepped through the doorway, then stifled a gasp at the sight that greeted me. It was like a regular (albeit large) doctor's office, complete with a bed and cabinets that I assumed were probably full of medications and equipment. Jesus.
"Hey, Bella," Didyme called as I approached her desk, then stood up and met Edward and I halfway, hugging each of us in greeting before smiling widely. "How are you both today?"
I blushed instantly.
"Pretty good thanks, Di," Edward told her, glancing at me and smirking slightly. I rolled my eyes at him, but smiled back anyway.
"Good," Didyme replied, missing our little exchange. "Now, we all know why we're here, so why don't you go pop up on the bed, Bella, and I'll set everything up?" She started to walk over to the cabinets on the other side of the room. "Feel free to pull the bed out ninety degrees if you want Edward to hold your hand while we do this."
"That'll be great. Thanks, Di," Edward said softly, looking over to me for confirmation he didn't need. I smiled at him, then walked over to the bed and rotated it to free up both sides before quickly removing my shoes and lying down on my back.
Edward grabbed a chair from beside Didyme's desk, then moved it to my right-hand side and sat down on it, reaching for my hand as Didyme walked over to us, pushing a small trolley with supplies on the top of it along beside her.
"Okay, Bella. I'm sure you were probably told what the removal procedure is when your implant was fitted, but I'm going to run through what's going to happen anyway just in case, alright?" Once I'd nodded in agreement, she continued, "First of all, I'm going to locate the implant itself, then inject some lidocaine into your arm to numb the area and stop the implant from moving. Once it's kicked in, I'll have to make a small incision at the base of the implant, then manipulate the implant slightly to grasp it with forceps before pulling it out."
"Then you'll put steri-strips on to help the wound close and heal before bandaging me up, right?" I asked, more for Edward's sake than my own. Didyme nodded and smiled.
"Will she scar?" Edward wondered, looking concerned. I squeezed his hand to try and calm him.
"Edward, it won't be very big. You've seen the small one left from the initial insertion – this new one will be the same size," I assured him, smiling. He nodded weakly, but his concern still didn't fade.
"You ready?" Didyme asked softly.
"Yup," I told her, then lifted my left arm into position as she pulled on a pair of latex gloves. She felt around for the implant as Edward watched on nervously, then turned to pick up a syringe and a small bottle of lidocaine before filling it to the correct level and turning back to face me.
"This will only hurt a bit," she promised.
She was right.
A few minutes later, I was implant-free and Didyme was almost done bandaging me up. Edward still hadn't let go of my hand, even though I'd sat up and assured him I was okay, but I didn't mind. It was nice to know someone was concerned about me, however unnecessary that concern may have been.
"Okay, Bella. All done!" Didyme told me happily with a smile, then stepped back and pulled off her gloves before dumping them into the yellow trash bag attached to the trolley. "Do you want to discuss other forms of contraception, or are you okay in that department? If you're planning on starting a family, of course, I'll be happy to-"
"No," Edward interrupted, shaking his head. "We're not planning on having children."
Ouch.
Didyme looked startled for a moment, but quickly recovered. "Will you be needing an alternative form of contraception, or are you planning on using condoms?"
I blushed hotly and pulled my hand out of Edward's grasp, hurt by what he'd said and embarrassed to be having this conversation in front of him.
"I think I'd like to go on the pill," I told her. "But since it's not one hundred percent effective and Edward doesn't want us to take any risks, should we use condoms too?"
I tried to keep my tone casual, but the almost-wounded expression on Edward's face was proof that I'd failed.
"Umm…" Didyme glanced between the two of us, clearly confused by the sudden tension between us. "The pill is very effective if taken correctly, but a condom would definitely act as a safety net, if you like. You don't have to use them, though – the chances of the pill failing are very slim."
"Okay." I turned to look at Edward, trying to keep my expression neutral. He was frowning down at his hands, and didn't look up until I said his name. "What do you think?"
"I don't…" He trailed off, then exhaled a shaky sigh. "We don't have to use both if you don't want to, Bella."
"I know that," I told him, "but I'm not the one who'll be putting on condoms and dealing with the clean up, which is why I'm asking you for your opinion."
"If Didyme says the pill should be enough, then we only need to use that," he replied. "Both of us are clean, so that aspect's covered. I just… I don't want to risk you getting pregnant."
"Yeah, you've made your objections about that happening pretty clear," I muttered, not really meaning for him to hear me. But, of course, he did anyway.
"Bella…"
Didyme cleared her throat, obviously uncomfortable. "The pill can be stopped just as easily as it can be started, and your fertility should return to normal pretty quickly, should you decide to have children at some point in the future."
"No worries about that happening, Doc," I replied, shrugging. "Edward knows what he wants… or doesn't want, in this case. It may actually be worth getting another impl-"
"Bella!" Edward looked up at me in a mixture of horror and shock, instantly making me regret my words.
I opened my mouth to reply, but was interrupted by the loud ringing of Didyme's phone from the desk. Didyme jumped at the chance to remove herself from the situation, mumbling a quick apology before rushing over to her desk to answer the call.
I swallowed audibly and looked down at my lap. I'd taken things too far, I knew that, but even though I also knew that having children wouldn't be a good idea for a while, the fact he'd completely dismissed and outright rejected the mere suggestion of me getting pregnant hurt, so I wasn't completely sorry I'd said what I had.
"I didn't…" Edward trailed off, exhaled a nervous breath, then continued, "I didn't mean to upset you."
"You didn't," I lied. "It's fine."
"No, it's not," he replied, and I saw him shake his head out the corner of my eye. "I just… Bella, we can't. Not now."
"I know," I told him truthfully.
"I'm not saying never," he said softly, reaching out to grip my hand, which just rested there limply. "Just not right now."
I nodded weakly, deliberately shifting my gaze to Didyme, who looked like she was just finishing up her phone call. "You probably wouldn't want your children to have my crappy genes anyway."
"Yes I would," he replied softly. I scoffed, no longer sure if he was saying that just because of the microphones, and shook my head as Didyme came back over to us with a nervous expression on her face.
"Everything okay?" she asked worriedly, looking between then two of us. I nodded at her and forced myself to smile.
"We're good," I told her. She smiled in relief, then sat down on the opposite end of the bed.
"Have you decided what you're going to do?"
"Bella's going to go on the pill," Edward told her before I had the chance to reply. I turned my head in his direction, shocked, but his gaze was deliberately fixed on Didyme.
"Okay," Didyme said softly. "Before I supply you with the medication, Bella, I'm going to need to ask you a few questions. Is that okay?"
"Yeah, sure," I replied, turning back to her. "Fire away."
"I-" She began, but was interrupted by someone knocking loudly on the door.
"Di? Honey, it's Marcus."
"I'm with a patient!" she called back, looking agitated. Marcus pushed open the door anyway and stepped into the room, his gaze instantly seeking (and finding) Edward.
"May I talk to you for a moment?" he asked.
"Can't this wait?" Didyme replied, her frustration evident.
"It's important," Marcus continued, pointedly ignoring her. Edward hesitated, then turned to look at me questioningly.
"You can go," I told him softly.
"I don't want to leave you," he murmured, shaking his head.
"Marcus needs you," I said, turning my hand over beneath his and entwining our fingers briefly. "Go."
He nodded weakly and stood up, glancing over to Marcus before gazing down at me, his internal conflict painfully obvious.
"I'll talk to you when you get back," I promised, then pulled him closer by his hand and placed my free one on the back of his head, bringing his lips down to mine so that I could kiss him softly.
When our lips parted after only a few seconds, Edward made a small sound of protest, then pressed his lips back onto mine much harder than before, kissing me deeply but passionately.
"I'll be right back," he murmured, then squeezed my hand before walking round the bed and over to Marcus, who was looking at us with a strange expression on his face.
I watched the two of them leave, then turned back to Didyme, who was smiling.
"What?" I asked, confused.
"The pair of you," she replied.
"What about us?"
"Nothing," she told me, shrugging. "It's just refreshing to see two people so in love."
My eyebrows rose in shock that I quickly tried to hide.
"You seemed surprised," she noticed, tilting her head to the side slightly as she gazed at me curiously.
"I'm not," I lied. "I just… How can you tell?"
She threw her head back and laughed loudly. "Bella, whenever Edward sees you, he lights up in a way I've never seen him do before. He looks at you like… Like you're the only thing in his existence that has meaning. And you… God, Bella, you become more and more like him each time I see you. Your mannerisms echo each other's, and I've seen the way you are when you don't realize anyone's looking."
"What do you mean?" My mouth had gone dry at that point, but I couldn't pinpoint if it was due to fear, shock, or disbelief.
"It's like you center yourself around him," she told me. "Every time he moves, so do you. And the killer thing is that you don't even realize you do it. Both of you are blind to it."
I gazed down at my lap. Did I really do that?
My gut told me Didyme was probably right.
"I never noticed that before," I admitted, shrugging.
"I know," she replied. "And, somehow, that makes it even more incredible."
I exhaled a long breath, unsure of what to say.
"Shall we get started on the questions?" she suggested softly.
"Please," I responded, nodding my head.
"Let me go get my clipboard."
"Okay, just one more question now, I promise."
I laughed softly, then gestured for her to go on. She'd been asking me various health questions over the past ten minutes and had measured my height, weight, and blood pressure to make sure I was okay to take the pill, and to say I was getting tired of answering her was an understatement.
"When was the first day of your last period?" she asked.
"October 13th," I told her, blushing even though I wasn't embarrassed.
"Are your cycles regular?"
I cringed internally. I hated these kinds of conversations, and was suddenly very glad Edward wasn't in the room. "They used to be until I got the implant fitted – now they're pretty irregular."
"The pill should help regulate them again," she told me, smiling.
"That's… good." It came out as a question, making Didyme laugh.
"It is. It'll certainly help you keep track of things, and you'll know that, if you do miss your period, it's not because they're irregular."
"Basically, I'll know if I'm pregnant," I said, nodding my head. Didyme sighed, then placed her clipboard down on her desk.
"I'm sorry if I put you in an awkward position earlier," she murmured, sounding almost sad.
"No, that wasn't you," I assured her. "We just… We haven't really spoken about that yet."
"Of course. I understand," she replied softly. "Even so, I'm sorry to have made it an issue."
"Don't worry about it," I told her, smiling. "If anything, I'm the one who should be apologizing for making you get caught up in the middle of everything."
She shrugged. "It's okay."
"No, it's not, but okay." She smiled at me, then pulled open one of the desk drawers beside her and reached inside for something I couldn't see.
"I'm going to give you three month's supply as a trial," she said as she handed me a box of tablets labeled Microgynon. "You'll need to take one at the same time every day for three weeks, then have a break for one week unless you want to run two packets together."
"Should I come back to you a few days before the final pack ends?" I asked, turning the box over in my hands.
"Yep, but if you have any issues before then, feel free to come and speak to me sooner," she told me, smiling as she stood up.
"Okay then." I got to my feet as well, and the two of us hovered there awkwardly for a few seconds before finally deciding to hug. "Thanks, Di."
"You're very welcome," she murmured, then gave me one final squeeze before pulling back and gesturing to the door. "Shall we go and hunt down our boys?"
I nodded, then smiled as we walked over to the door and pulled it open, but that smile faded the moment I realized Edward and Marcus were nowhere to be seen.
"Where'd they go?" I wondered, frowning.
"I'm not sure," Didyme replied, sounding as confused as I felt, "but they've probably gone to find somewhere more private if they're talking about important business-related stuff."
"Right…"
I had two options: go back to the suite by myself, or wait here until Edward returned. Option one won hands down.
"Di, would you mind if I hung around here for a bit until Edward gets back?" I asked her. "Unless you've got another patient coming in?"
"I haven't got another patient," she replied quickly. "But Bella… Even if I did, you'd still be welcome to stay."
"Thanks," I murmured, smiling weakly.
"How are you coping?" She looked genuinely concerned. "After everything?"
"I'm… okay," I told her truthfully. "I've been having dreams lately, though. Well, they're more like nightmares, I guess."
"That's very common after a trauma like the one you experienced," she assured me, placing a comforting hand on my arm. "If you ever need anyone to talk to…"
"I'll come to you," I promised. She smiled at me, then glanced over my shoulder and laughed softly.
"What?" I wondered, frowning.
"Sorry we took so long." Warm arms wrapped around me from behind, and I automatically leaned in to them, sighing as I felt lips brush against my neck.
"Hey, Edward," I murmured.
"Hello, baby," he replied, kissing my neck again before straightening up slightly, still keeping his arms around me. "Did you get everything sorted out?"
"Yup," I told him, smiling even though I knew he couldn't see me. "I'm on a three month trial to see if I have any side effects, and then I'm going to have another appointment with Di to talk about things again."
"That's good," he said softly.
"I'm going to need to keep the phone you lent me however long ago," I realized as I turned to face him. "I need to have an alarm on me at all times so I don't forget to take it."
"Bella, that phone's yours," he replied, shaking his head. "I thought you knew that."
"Um…" That was a surprise. "No?"
"Oh." He looked a bit confused. "Well… Happy birthday?"
"My birthday was almost two months ago," I pointed out. He shrugged.
"Whatever. It's yours." He leaned in and kissed me quickly, but something was off about it. It almost felt as though he wanted to hightail it out of there and run.
A bolt of fear rushed up my spine.
"Sorry to have kept you waiting so long." Edward looked over my shoulder at Didyme, who waved him off.
"It's not a big deal. Bella and I kept ourselves entertained."
"I'm glad to hear it," he replied, grinning down at me. "You ready to go?"
"Yeah." I nodded at him, but I genuinely had no idea whether he was speaking in code at that point. Were we in trouble?
"Okay then," he said softly, then looked at Didyme again. "I take it you're going tomorrow?"
"Of course," she replied. "I'll see you then?"
"Bright and early," Edward teased, smiling at her.
"Bye, Bella," Didyme's attention was on me now, and her face certainly didn't seem to reveal any potential issues Edward and I may be experiencing. Maybe we were okay after all.
"Bye," I replied meekly, then waved at her before allowing Edward to take me by the hand and lead me down the hallway, all the way through to the shuttle.
"Everything okay with you and Marcus?" I asked, trying to sound casual as he pressed the 'call' button.
"Yup," he assured me, smiling as the shuttle doors opened and we stepped inside. He angled me so I could see the control panel as he hit the button for our 'stop', and upon realizing he was once again trying to tell me something, I quickly scanned all the buttons. There was nothing out of the ordinary about them really – they were just regular buttons.
But then my eyes fell upon a red button at the bottom of the panel, and I knew that was significant somehow. Maybe it activated the trap door?
Not wanting to arouse suspicion, I averted my gaze from the panel, then leaned in to Edward's chest and closed my eyes. Today had already been a mini-rollercoaster of emotions, and it probably wasn't even past noon yet.
"You okay, baby?" Edward kissed the top of my head, then gently coaxed me to look him in the eyes.
"I'm good," I replied truthfully, unable to stop myself from rising up onto my tiptoes and kissing him softly. He moaned quietly in response, then slipped his arms around my waist and pulled me up against him as the kiss deepened.
"When we get back to the suite," he murmured, kissing his way down to my neck, "you are going to take one of those pills, and then we're going to shower, and if you're too sore, we're going to put that little bottle on the shelf to good use again, aren't we?"
I groaned, pressing my hips into his as one of his hands moved to cup my ass. "You mean we're going to…"
"We aren't doing anything," he breathed, gently biting my earlobe. "I am going to fuck you, and you won't be able to do anything but let me."
"Oh, God…" I whispered. The effect his words had on me was immediate, even though I knew they were just for show. "Even if I'm not too sore… Can we put that bottle to good use anyway?"
"Instead?" he asked, sounding almost surprised.
"No," I murmured, shaking my head as the shuttle slowed to a stop and the doors slid open. "I want it both ways."
Before he had the chance to reply, I ran out the shuttle and headed for the staircase at the end of the hallway, knowing he'd be right behind me.
"You little…" he muttered, and I heard his hurried footsteps coming up the stairs as I ran away from him, giggling.
"I'm gonna get you for that," he called, neither of us slowing much despite the number of stairs and hallways we ran up.
"You better catch me first!" I teased, making myself sound breathless when I reached the top of the final flight of stairs.
He was catching up with me, and I was letting him, but he wasn't able to finally grab hold of me until I got to the suite door and pretended to realize the door was locked.
"Not fair!" I cried as he hoisted me up onto his shoulder and awkwardly tried to swipe his key card with one hand. I tried not to struggle too much in his grip, terrified I'd slip and fall flat on my face, and as he carried me though into the suite, I hit his ass in mock-protest.
"Put me down!" I squealed, then gasped when he suddenly did so without warning. "Ah, headrush!"
"Take your pill," he told me, his tone dark and serious. I rolled my eyes playfully, deliberately fumbling with the box as I tried to open it.
"I can't dry swallow them," I lied, pulling out one of the blister packs and finding the correct day.
"Yes, you can." His gaze was intense as I pushed out one of the pills, but I couldn't resist teasing him anyway.
"What time is it?" I asked.
"Bella!"
"What?" I tried to look innocent, but it probably didn't work. "I need to know when to take the next one, dummy."
He huffed, then walked over to the bedside table and picked up his – my – phone. "It's five minutes to twelve."
"Okay," I replied, then quickly dry swallowed the tiny pill before slowly walking towards him. "There. Gone."
He nodded quickly, then closed the distance between us and kissed me urgently, almost crushing my body to his as he started to back me towards the bathroom. I braced myself for the moment my back collided with the door, but it never came.
Instead, Edward reached forwards ahead of time and opened the door, quickly leading us through it before breaking the kiss and kicking the door shut again.
"Take off your clothes," he practically demanded, pulling his own t-shirt over his head. "Right now."
My eyes widened in surprise at his forceful tone, but I found myself doing what he'd told me anyway, and soon we were both naked, our clothes strewn haphazardly across the floor.
"Get in the shower."
I turned around so quickly, I almost fell over, and then I rushed over to the shower and pushed the doors open with much more force than necessary. Whatever he had to say was very, very important, and I knew we couldn't waste any more time.
As I turned the sprays on, making sure to keep my arm as far away from the water as possible, I heard Edward step in the shower behind me and close the doors. Once he was sure the jets were loud enough and warm enough, he stepped forwards and twisted me round to face him.
"Bella…" He pressed his lips to mine briefly, then stepped back and held both my hands in his.
"What's going on?" I asked, entwining our fingers and squeezing.
"We're going to Buffalo tomorrow with Marcus and Didyme."
"Buffalo, Wyoming?" He nodded. "Edward, that's, like, nine hours away!"
"That's why we'll be staying there a few days," he explained. "And the moment we get some free time, we're going to go find the nearest payphone, and you are going to call The Agency."
My eyebrows shot up at that. "Why?"
"Because we're breaking out in fourteen days, and we're going to need them to get as far away as possible, as fast as possible."
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